sugar shakes, day 9

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before lunch i got a bit shaky but i didn’t feel that hungry. so i thought a bit more about it and realized that i’ve been shaky the past few days and am consuming 1/3 to 1/2 the amount of sugar i normally do at home. thus, i’ve diagnosed myself with the sugar shakes. gave myself half a vegan brownie to fix it up! anyone else get these? guess the ideal is to balance the system rather than shoot it with the amounts of sugar i do. boy, do i LOVE sugar! has always fit my diet, vegetarian or not, and that’s kept it a staple.

today was fabulous as i made it just in time to be on time to 8am meditation. after meditation while i was flipping through our schedule, i realized we were on day 4 of our current 5-day plan, not day 3 as i’d originally thought. clearly i’ve lost connection with time. anyway, it was like christmas as i realized i’d get to see my beau again tomorrow night at 11:30pm and only had to get up at the ungodly hour of 7am one more morning before i got to sleep in! it’s the simple things, ya know!

a couple fun stories:

1. spiders. i had a spider friend for 4 days but i think he’s moved on. every night i’d look for him. he was on the ceiling by the infamous fire alarm. next night on the ceiling by the light. next night near the window. finally, the little booger was hanging from his web and landed on my bed (luckily for me it was the night i met up with beau and pug in town). anyway, now he’s moved on and i miss him. it had become kinda fun to play the “where’s waldo (that was his nickname)?” game.

2. during the sanskrit classes, i was pointed out by the teacher we pronouncing the “ra” vowel sound. apparently she could tell by my mouth movement 4 rows back that i wasn’t getting it. so one of the mentors had to come over and assist while i belted out “ra” “la” for 5 minutes. it reminded me of first grade when i was pulled out of class for speech therapy. i was so excited to be called out for something special, then i had a few years of correcting “wabbit” with “rabbit.” the drama continues . . . in sanskrit.

today’s lesson:

ok, now for today’s lesson. was more on karma, how asanas help resolve karma, and that the nature of our true self is joy. sharon gannon repeated the reminded of not regreting or feeling guilty. i asked “what is the difference between reflecting and regreting?” because i struggle with the constant desire to improve and grow, while also knowing when to be in the moment or just move on. i loved her answer which was that reflection has hope in it, regret is mired in the past!

then the lesson continued as i was reading more of my ZBA book (mentioned in my previous post) which states:

there is always more to learn, more to accomplish, and more to understand. we exacerbate difficulties in business by wanting things to be different from how they are, by wanting things to be neat and to fit our images of how we want things to be or how they are supposed to be. yes, there is a paradox here. our jobs are often to make things different from how they are, to increase sales, to provide better service, to educate, to increase efficiency, and so on. but if we are always focused on change, on getting results, we can be distracted from being attentive, being present to what is right in front of us. our habits and patterns get in the way. once we recognize and accept difficulty as part of our business life, we see how to accepting what is right in front of us increases the difficulty (p. 54).

wow – talk about two great lessons on karma and handling challenges. tonight we’re being shown the earthling. hmm, from what i’ve read just finding the link for you, it will be intense. sometimes i erroneously think ignorance is bliss on so many levels as the truth can often be so overwhelming, eh? (can you tell i’ve been hanging out with a dear canadian, eh?)

i’ll leave you with this quote from swami satchidananda who founded yogaville (where we have 2 rejuvenating retreats/year):

look within.
if you don’t see the peace in you, you won’t be able to see the peace outside.
you have to have that peaceful vision, because it is you who sees the world outside.
you have been created to serve others. god created you.
what for? to fulfill god’s mission, not your mission.
if you know that, then all your desires become selfless.
we are made to live to serve others.